Welcome to The Shifty Lizard Times!

Satirical News from the Fringe of Reality, the Future, and That Weird Alley Behind The Super-Market

The Shifty Lizard brings you the stories you don't need, didn't know you didn't need, and now have... You're welcome!

The Shifty Lizard Times is your official source for absurd future news, conspiratorial humor, and fringe-adjacent satire that raises eyebrows, questions, and the occasional government watchlist.

We specialize in uncovering the stories they don’t want you to find — mostly because they’re completely fabricated and slightly radioactive. From shadowy government experiments to prophecies written in BBQ sauce, we bring you the news from a dimension slightly to the left of plausible.

This isn't just fake news. This is strategically misinformed journalism from the very edge of reality.

What You’ll Find Here:

• Future Dystopia Satire — Stories from the future, parallel universes, and beyond. Including hover tax fraud and sentient sandwich uprisings.
• Conspiracy Comedy — Satirical exposés on lizard people, cursed vending machines, and secret cabals hiding in every HOA.
• Absurdist Headlines — Think The Onion, if it drank too much cough syrup and moved to Michigan.
• Character-Driven Weirdness — Follow the noir monologues of Quincy Quirk, the Shifty Lizard himself, as he investigates the truth behind truths.

Why Follow Us?

Because if you don’t stay informed, you’ll never know when Michigan accidentally secedes or when AI becomes sentient and passive-aggressive. Plus, we're the only news source legally allowed to use the phrase "quantum opossum alliance" in every fourth headline.

🦎 Shifty Lizard Times — Truth Isn’t Just Stranger Than Fiction. It’s Better When We Make It Up.

You have a broad choice in satirical news & nonsense. We appreciate you turning to us for your daily dose of dumb news content!